Going through a divorce means experiencing a loss. It’s a grieving process, and it’s important to accept the fact that your life will be different.
But you have to get through the grief in order to move on to healing. So, whether you’re really struggling to move forward after going through your divorce or you just don’t know what your next chapter looks like, focusing on the healing process can help you to take the first step on your post-divorce journey.
Yes, recovery is possible! And if you make it a priority, you can find freedom in your new way of living.
Let’s take a look at three ways to focus on the healing process.
Participate in a Divorce Recovery Group
One of the mistakes many people make after going through a divorce is feeling like they have to go through it alone. Unfortunately, divorce isn’t uncommon. Many people have to deal with it, and you can learn from them.
So, while family and friends can be helpful and supportive, it may be even more beneficial for you to join a divorce recovery group. In a group setting, you’ll not only learn new skills but also a lot more about yourself. You’ll have to do things differently on your own than you did before. And a recovery group can help you to have conviction in your decisions. It can also show you how to do new things that you’ve never tried on your own.
Additionally, you’ll hear from people who may have experienced very similar divorce situations as you did. They might be able to give you new insight or a different perspective on how to get through this difficult time.
Look For the Silver Lining
It’s easy to feel like you’re drowning after a divorce. Or that your life will never feel “whole” again. In these cases, you have to look for the silver lining. Of course, that can be easier said than done sometimes, but it’s more than just a motivational pep talk. Looking for the good in your life can make a big difference in how you take your next steps.
Some things in your life have undoubtedly changed for the better since your divorce. Dig deep and think about what those things are. What are the positive changes that can keep you going? Maybe you were able to move into a new home or keep the one you’ve loved for so long. Maybe there is less contention and stress in your household. These positive changes are different for everyone, so focus on what has really been a good thing for you.
Lean into those changes and they will continue to grow as you find more good things to focus on.
Accepting the fact that you are where you are for a reason is an essential mindset to carry with you through the recovery process. You can’t control everything, and the divorce may have not been your fault, but it happened for a reason. Simply put, you don’t need to be the cause of your problem in order to solve it.
Staying in some kind of denial over your situation will only make the recovery process harder and will drag it out over time. But when you accept reality, even if it’s a harsh one, you can start to focus on the future instead of worrying about the past.
You owe it to yourself to focus on your recovery!
If you’re going through a divorce or you need help finding or re-connecting to your sense of self, please contact the San Diego Divorce Counseling Center at www.DivorceCounselingCenter.com and click the Book Online button, or call us at 619-865-3203, to set up an appointment.